For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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