I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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