Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize