Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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