Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Randomize