Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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