tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I queefed so loud it echoed.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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