Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize