Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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