I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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