Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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