His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
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