Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize