I could have mohawked her pubes.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize