So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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