If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize