put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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