I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize