yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize