you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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