Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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