i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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