Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize