I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize