she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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