i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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