Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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