Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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