do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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