So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
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