went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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