i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize