and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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