I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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