Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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