Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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