I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Well I just put wine in my tea
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize