So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize