Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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