Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize