Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
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