Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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