So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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