After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
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Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
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When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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