my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
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