I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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