This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
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Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
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Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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