Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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