i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
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we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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