i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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